


Goodbye My Lover

by spn_in_a_trenchcoat



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bottom Castiel, Dean is stupid, F/M, Hurt Castiel, Hurt Dean Winchester, I Don't Even Know, Kitten!Misha, M/M, Rimming, Top Dean, can't sleep, like really
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-16
Updated: 2015-04-09
Packaged: 2018-02-25 14:10:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2624660
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spn_in_a_trenchcoat/pseuds/spn_in_a_trenchcoat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean was used to putting aside his needs in order to keep Sam safe. He put up walls to keep everyone out so that neither he nor them would get hurt... until he met Castiel. But then he realized he had gone and fallen in love. And so he did what Dean Winchester does, he ran.<br/>***<br/>Castiel grew up quiet, shy, cold, and was socially ackward. He let Dean in and thought that perhaps things would be okay. He would finally be happy. But he was wrong...<br/>Now that he has his life back under control he meets Dean again and he's not ready to love him one more time. Dean is successful but something has always been missing...</p><p>idk. I suck at summaries. I always say too much... ENJOY!!!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The story is mostly set eight years after they break up. First fic ever so be gentle. Comments are always welcomed! Feel free to tell me what you think.

Castiel stood there, underneath the big oak tree on top of the hill. Raindrops hit the ground around him with a 'splat' that sounded so loud in the quiet of the night. The clouds were looming over him, laughing at him as he saw the love of his life drive away. He felt a tightening in his chest, the knot in there growing bigger and bigger until he flt that it would explode. 

How could he have been so stupid??? Of course he didn't love him, no one did. He was ackward at best, he had no social skills and he was blunt, strightfoward, and some people saw that as rude. But honestly, he didn't know what to do. He grew up in a household where silence was always demanded. And now, that coldness and shyness he had used to grow up, to protect himself had pushed away the one person that he had opened up to. He had lost him, perhaps forever. 

He watch as the car drove down the hill, its blackness fitting in perfectly with the storm surrounding him. He stood there, motionless, waiting for it to disappear out of sight and take his love with him. 

Slowly, the car drew further and further until it disppeared into the rain. Castiel finally let himself fall to his knees on the wet, muddy ground. He let himself crumble, fall, and break to pieces just as his heart did. 

***  
He drove away, his eyes on the figure standing under the oak tree, letting the rain cover the sounds of his breathing. He felt as if someone had plunged their hand in his chest, twisted his heart before forcefully pulling it out. He knew the fault was his, but he was broken up that Castiel had just stood there, he hadn't even tried to stop him. He had just stood there, under the rain, and let Dean break their love piece by piece. How could someone do that if the felt as strongly as he did? Did he not love him the way Dean had loved him? Was it all a lie? Perhaps it was better to leave, perhaps it was better for his walls to go back up and stay up for the rest of his life so that he didn't get hurt and in the process hurt anyone else. 

Time. He would give it time.

But as he drove away and saw the figure of his once lover fall to their knees he knew that there wouldn't be anyone else for him. Castiel had ruined him. He would always be the one, but he couldn't bring himself to let him get hurt. He couldn't bring himself to hurt him just like he hurt everyone else. He wasn't enough. He never was. Everyone always left him. They all did. Because he was never good enough. He was broken beyond repair. 

He had Sam for now so he was going to do his damnest to be the best he could be. He would make him proud to be his brother, even if he had to throw his life away. He made a promise to his dad, but most importantly, he'd promised his mom that he would keep Sammy safe. He wouldn't let her down.

***  
Eight Years Later  
***

To say that he had kept his promise was an understatement. He went to college, graduated early and with the help of Bobby, his surrogate father, he had built his own company. Winchester & Winchester had risen from the ground. In two years, the company had flourished beyond their expectations. Dean had always loved working on cars, his Baby was a classic 1967 Chevy Impala, and so it was no brainer that his company was car based. They made car parts for classic cars, fixed them, and even sold the ones that Dean himself took to fixing. He bought junk cars at auctions for cheap, fixed and polished them and sold them. Needless to say, he did what he loved and it showed. Seeing as to how there were two Winchesters in blood and company name Dean allowed Sam to take the legal part of the company. He was head legal while Dean was CEO of the whole company.  
The two brothers had argued about the division of the company but Sam was adamant that since it was Dean that had spent all his savings and dedication into it while Sam went to college it should be Dean's baby wholeheartedly. And so they built the headquarters and two more shops to begin their united car reign.

Bobby had asked for nothing but his own shop and so Dean had given him a shop all for himself and named him the owner. He was in charge of everything and he bought his supplies from Dean so in the end, everyone benefitted from it.

But even though things were going great for him financally, Dean still felt something missing. But he couldn't bring himself to go there. He couldn't let himself think about blue eyes and dark hair. If he did, there's no telling how broken he'd end up over it. And so, just like he had for the past eight years since breaking it off with Castiel and moving to Pennsylvania, he inmmersed himself in his work. 

Eventually the time came for the anniversary of the company's innaguration. He, Sam, and Bobby planned the reception he had to admit, sometimes it served to have a girl for a brother, Samantha could decorate and organize. Now he just had to prepare his speech to celebrate his other Baby's second year. Shit...

***

Castiel had just moved to Pennsylvannia for his promotion when Balthazar, his closest friend invited to some anniversary party. He hoestly had no idea whose anniversary it was, or where it was going to be. He just hoped that it wasn't Dean's company's party. He knew he was here in Pennsylvannia as soon as he arrived and on his way to his new home passed by their headquarters. His heart had beaten like crazy and his palms had sweated profusely. He hadn't stopped loving Dean but he couldn't feel anything but dread as he imagined bumping into him someday.

He had barely gone out of his house in fear of seeing him, but Balthazar had pushed and pushed until he gave in. He had cornered him at work and pleaded him to be his friendly plus one to an anniversary party. And to keep his friend quiet for a while he had said yes without even asking where to. 

The party was tonight at seven so he left work early, his updates and notes for tomorrow's board meeting were ready so he left a couple of hours before he usually did. As tedious as it was, he loved his job. He had always loved numbers and was good with them so being an accountant came easy to him, that and the money was good.  
He walked home and headed straight to the shower. As soon as he got to his bedroom a blurr of black fur came hurling towards him. Laughing, he picked up the kitten and scratched behind its ear. The small kitten purred and nuzzled into his neck. He petted it once more before setting it down on the bed.

"Now you stay there Misha, I have to shower and get ready." He took out a treat from the sall container on top of his dresser and fed it to Misha before going to the walk-in closet and picking his outfit for the party. 

He settled for a navy blue shirt, a blue tie that brought out his eyes (as Balthazar had told him: "They bring out those baby blues of yours Cassie. Looks hot."), and his black suit and shoes. He gently set them on the bed and with a stern "Don't touch" to Misha he began undressing. 

He quickly took a shower and shaved, leaving a small five o'clock stubble, and dressed. It was 6:30 by the time he had finished. He still had a few minutes before Balthazar picked him up so he went to the living room and retrieved Misha's trays and filled them with food and water. He then sat and waited. Five minutes passed before he saw the lights of Balthazar's car pulling into the driveway. With a sigh he got up, said goodbye to Misha and walked out the door, locking it quiety behind him. 

As he walked to the car Balthazar stepped out and looked him up and down. He whistled.

"Woah Cassie. Now I don't know if I should take you. Might steal all the ladies... or gents." He wiggled his eyebrows.

"You have no need to worry Balthazar. I am not going to attract anyone. I am just your plus one. Now I believe it is time to go or else we will be late. And it is not respectful to show up late when..."

"Yeah yeah. Just get your punctual, hot ass in the car."

They both got in and Balthazar pulled out of the driveway heading for their destination. There was no backing out now Castiel thought as he stared out the window.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is in Dean's point of view. It's all mostly before party talk. He walks around greeting people when he looks back at the door and sees a dark mop of hair, blue eyes, and pink chapped lips he never expected to see again. And then those eyes look up and lock with his...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys. Like I said before, this is my first fic so comments and critiques are welcomed! I'll try to update daily. I don't plan on this being a long fic, for my first so... I have another idea I want to write, more academy sort of setting, but I am going to finish this one first and see how you like it.

Dean sighed as he got dressed for the party. He hated talking to big crowds. He also didn't like getting all dressed up. The company was his, he could do whatever the hell he wanted. But he also understood that he needed to keep his image as an entrepreneur. All fancy pants and shit. He could put on his jeans and leather jacket later, now was the time to look like a business owner. There were going to be people interested in his company at the party and he had to look his best.

He grabbed his shirt and put it on, he then put on his tie. He was wearing an all sleek black suit to match his brother. Sam thought it would should unity in the company's CEO and legal head.

He left his house an hour before the actual even started. Sam was arriving before he did to check that everything was in place. Cause that was Sam for you, aka Samantha. He drove Baby down streets filled with people even though the night was getting colder since autumn was approaching. 

His phone vibrated in his pocket and when he glanced at it he saw Sam's caller id.

"Heya Sammy!" He could hear Sam's voice yelling out instructions before he finally spoke.

"Hey Dean. Where are you. I thought you'd be here ten minutes ago." He sounded irritated. Dean had one job, one, to get to the party on time to greet the guests. And he was late.

"What the hell Sam? You said an hour before the party actually started. I hit traffic dude. Relax, I'll be there soon." Geez, sometimes his little brother could be a pain in the ass.

"Alright alright. Just hurry. Jess and I are doing all we can right now." He paused for a couple of seconds and Dean could hear the little gadgets moving around in the floppy-haired head of his. "I know how hard you worked for this Dean and look, you're celebrating its second year! I'm proud of you Dean. Really."

Dean could feel tears forming in his eyes. He knew that he was doing well, everything was, but hearing it from Sammy's lips meant the world to him. He cleared his throat before speaking. "Thanks Sam. Don't worry I'm almost there. Look, I can already see your big sasquatch self out on the front..." 

He laughed at the sound of indignation coming from Sam before the line went dead. Leave it to his brother to be as sensitive as he was tall. Heh. He pulled his Baby to the side of the road in front of the office's building and got out. He saw Garth, a scrawny looking kid, walk over and he gave him his keys. "Not one scratch on her ya hear? Treat her right." He loved messing with the kid. He was a High School senior working to save up for college and you wouldn't believe how stressed out he'd get over the littlest thing. But don't let that fool you, he was feisty when he needed to. He'd even gotten on to Dean a couple of times. And so Dean had grown fond of the kid. All of his hugging-loving self.

"Yeah yeah Dean, I'll take care of your lady for you.." He winked and drove off toward the parking garage leaving a stunned, open-mouthed Dean on the sidewalk.

"Damn kid. Only I take care of my girl. Hmm." With that he walked into the building and no sooner did he step a foot through the threshold than he had a sasquatch on him.

"Damn am I glad you're here. Gabriel won't stop with the tactics and tricks and the party's going to start any minute now" He watch silently, containing his laughter as Sam talked moving his hands in the air and occasionally pulling at his hair."...and we need the glasses set and the name tags and what if he pulls a trick on one of the guests that don't know any better??? It's going to be a disaster Dean and..."

"Sam!" He waited for his brother to take a breath before speaking again. "Dude. Chill ok? It's cool. He knows he can't pull tricks or else he's on break room clean up duty for a month."

And speaking of the devil he thought as he saw Gabriel coming out of a side door with a lollipop in his mouth. He walked over to them with a smile on his face. In all the years that he had known Gabriel Dean had always put up with his shenanigans. Now wasn't any different. He was a genius in advertising and it showed. The only thing that might have set off their friendship was the fact that he was Castiel's cousin. He hadn't said anything to Dean about the way him and Castiel had separated but he also had left his house long before Dean and Cas were a thing. As far as Dean knew, him and Cas hadn't spoken in years, let alone seen each other.

"What's up Samskins? Hey! Dean-o! You looking good tonight. Any one lady catch your eye?" He wiggled his right eyebrow and pulled the lollipop out of his mouth with a pop.  
Dean rolled his eyes. "No Gabe. Now stop with the tricks. I mean it. Or it's two months on cleaning duty." He smirked at the way the trickster's eyes almost popped out of his head. 

"Ahhh Hell NO! It's almost time for Becky's birthday and that girl goes bat-shit with the food. I'll behave. Honest." He grabbed the lollipop and crossed it over his heart. "Anyway, everything's done here. All we have to do now is wait for the folks to get here."

AS if on cue, Dean saw people start to come in through the doors and look around. Many were nodding their heads and smiling so Dean took that as a good sign of Sam's decorative skills. Speaking of skills... 

"Hey Sam, where's Jess?" He hadn't seen her since he'd come in. And her and his brother were practically attached to the hip.

"Uhh she went to the bathroom to retouch her makeup. Oh! There she comes. Hey babe" Sam smiled at his fiancé and kissed her softly on the lips.

"Hey baby. Hi Dean. How'd you like everything?" She smiled and Dean pulled her into a hug. He really liked her, she was good for his Sammy, even if she was out of his league as he always reminded them.

"Everything's looking good Jess. Gabe here give you any trouble?" He asked, his mouth twitching with the effort not to laugh at how Gabe practically shielded himself from her behind Dean. They began bickering before Dean and Sam left to greet people.

He had spent at least twenty minutes at the door before Lisa Breaden came and pulled him away to meet her friends. He liked Lisa, she was smart, funny, and hot, not to mention great in bed but things hadn't worked out for them. The spark that he'd had with... well, it was missing and he couldn't bring himself to keep leading her on. They had broken it off and remained good friends. He loved her little boy like a son and that helped their friendship even more. Lisa took him to the small group of about five ladies gathered around the bar. He noted that they all looked him up and down. Honestly he was used to the attention. He knew he was good looking but still, having five hot ladies checking him out flattered him. He couldn't help but notice that none of them looked right. Two had blue eyes but they were the wrong shade. Three were brunettes but the hair was too light. After all these years, he still scanned every crowd he was in and looked for a dark mop of hair, electric blue eyes, and soft, pink chapped lips. He never did find them of course, but he couldn't help but hope. And so he wasn't hoping this time, when he turned around and looked over at the guests just arriving, to see said mop of black hair, blue eyes, and pink chapped lips walking through the door into his building, accompanied by Balthazar of all people. 

He watched him smile and blush as Balthazar leaned in and whispered in his ear. And then very slowly, he raised his head and looked straight at Dean. Their eyes met and Dean felt his heart beat faster only to crash into the wall as he saw Castiel's eyes harden and his mouth form a thin line. He looked away and began talking to the couple greeting them, ignoring Dean's gaze on him. 

Dean continued looking, he looked Cas up and down admiring the way the suit he wore fit him to a T and how his shirt and tie brought out his eyes. He saw him move away and talk and laugh with Balthazar by his side and he felt his world collapse once more sine that rainy day when he had left him under the rain, beside the oak tree on their hill. And even though his feelings were in turmoil he knew one thing: this was his doing. His fault. He deserved Castiel's rejection, his hatred, and more. But even this couldn't stop him from wanting to reach out even though he shouldn't.

He quickly tempered his emotions, he had a business to run after all, and turned back to the ladies around him, his arm still entwined with Lisa's. He ignored the feeling of eyes boring into his back and convinced himself that it was someone else because Castiel had moved on. He had forgotten him and fallen in love with someone else. Someone who wasn't Dean.


	3. author's note ( not a chapter. so sorry)

Hey lovelies,   
I know I promised to try and post daily, but my family's going through a difficult time right now. My mom just got diagnosed with breast cancer. She had it a while back and ut went into remission but it came back worse than before. She needs me right now and I hope you all understand. I am NOT letting this story go. No. But I will be away for some time. Until everything is stable. It's just her and I so I have to show her all my support. So sorry to let you know this late but please understand. 

I honestly cannot believe how many kudos the story has gotten and I'm overjoyed that you all enjoy it. Please continue to comment and I will add new chapters soon. Promise. Thanks for sticking with me. (:


	4. A Party and a Broken Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel and Dean meet after eight years and miscommunication shows her face. Cause really, that's the breaker in every relationship.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys. Like I promised, I have returned. I appreciate all the good thoughts and prayers. My mom is doing rather well, caught the cancer early since we already knew the symptoms. So here I am. Now go easy on me. this is not beta'd by anyone so if anyone's interested? (let me know) Or follow me on tumblr. deans-baby-in-a-trenchcoat

Castiel couldn't help the anxiety he felt as soon as he saw the Winchester & Winchester building getting closer. He knew he should've asked Balthazar where the party was but seeing as he knew nothing about Dean and his past relationship he decided that perhaps it wasn't fair to chastise him for something he did unknowingly. Balthazar stopped the car at the front as a young, skinny teenager came towards them.

"Good evening gentleman. Mr. Milton good to see you again." He greeted them enthusiastically and took the car keys.

"Hello again Garth. You know the drill."

Garth just nodded, took the keys and got into the car. Balthazar began walking and Castiel followed him into the building. He had to say, the room was magnificent. There were round tables set up in the middle of the room and very expensive-looking cars around the edge of the room. Clearly they had taken the show room and transformed it into a piece of art. There was a bar area to the left and on the right was a long rectangular table filled with a replica of the building and the cars they had in stock. There were rose centerpieces with golden bases at each table and the seats all had their own name tags. Everything was beautifully accentuated by the floor to ceiling windows at the front of the room over looking some expensive car being restored. It all came together with the rising podium at the front. 

Just as he was admiring the bar area and contemplating getting a drink, he felt Balthazar lean in to whisper in his ear. "Wonder if I can sneak someone into one of these cars for a quickie. Huh Cassie. You think I can?" 

Castiel blushed, he wasn't a prude but Balthazar just did not have a filter sometimes. He looked up looking for something to distract him and met the eyes of Dean Winchester. He saw his face turn to one of surprise and perhaps hope and felt his chest tighten. Castiel immediately schooled his expression. He felt his mouth form a thin line and his eyes harden. He almost regretted it as soon as he saw Dean's surprised face turn to one full of hurt. Castiel couldn't keep looking at him. If he did, he might run over and tell him he still loved him, he'd never stopped. And so, he turned back to Balthazar, who was openly admiring a young lady in front of them. He couldn't help but laugh at his friend's antics. When he turned back around, he saw Dean immersed in conversation with a group of women, one of whom, a rather pretty brunette, had her hand in his arm and was standing a bit too close to be friendly. He couldn't help but feel a bit jealous. He quickly dampened those emotions out of his head and instead decided to continue with the party. It was only a few hours, than, he could go back to his house with his cat, and his job. But mostly, he could go back to a life without Dean and the threat of letting him back in.

***

Dean decided to play it cool. Hah. Who was he kidding, he couldn't do this. He excused himself from Lisa and her friends and retreated to the back. He put his code into the security bar on the wall near the glass window and let himself in. He rounded the corner, out of sight, and exhaled. He had to get his things under control. 

"Come on. Just one stupid dinner party and you'll probably never see him again." He felt his eye moisten and abruptly stood up. No. He wasn't going to cry. This was his fault. Now he had to act like the grown-up he fucking was and move on. Or at least pretend he had. He took a few more moments to compose himself and went back inside. 

He met Sam and Jess near the front and told Sam to tell the waiters they were about to begin. He saw Cas talking with Gabriel near a corner and once again, could not help but stare. He saw Cas say something harshly to Gabriel and they both turned and looked at him. Dean quickly looked away and begin sizing the other party people. He saw Crowley and and his daughter Ruby taking a seat at one of the tables near the front, Kevin, Charlie, Benny, and Adam talking before Adam left to take a seat at his table, the same one where Sam and Jess were now sitting. He sighed and also took a seat with his brothers and Jess. The rest of the party took their seats and the dinner begin. 

Dinner went well, he and Sam had had to get up and talk to a few people but there were no incidents. Everything went smoothly. Then, it was time to talk. He took a gulp from his champagne and got up on the podium. 

"Good evening everybody and thank you for joining us in celebrating the second anniversary of this company. I know there are many things yet to come with us being new and all but we, my family and I, appreciate your constant help and solid presence. When Bobby pushed me into this I thought he'd gone crazy with old age..." there was laughter all over the room that intensified when Bobby muttered "idjit". "But, here I am, CEO of Winchester and Winchester and honestly, thank you old man." He smiled fondly at Bobby and tried to ignore the awws that filled the room.

"Alright alright. quit it you saps. Let me finish. You all know that I love working on cars and getting my hands dirty so not all my success is my own to keep. I couldn't have done it without you all and without you Sammy. So here's to twenty more years and anniversary parties!" 

He raised the glass and met glances with Castiel, who had a small smile on his face. He heard Sam clear his throat softly and realized that he'd been staring a bit longer than he thought. He got off the podium and sat back down. And so the rest of the party passed. Sam got up to talk, as did a few benefactors and some very wealthy, and well-satisfied customers. He got once again pulled along by Lisa and paraded around to her friends. Everyone knew that they'd been a thing and she wanted more but he wasn't in it. She wasn't the one. He and Castiel shared a few glances and eventually Balthazar caught on. He saw him pull Cas aside and tell him something. Castiel's face quickly turned angry and he glared at Balthazar. They continued to argue for a few minutes before Cas left to talk to Gabriel. Balthazar stayed behind with a shocked face and glaring at Dean. 

Dean sighed and turned to go find Sam. He found him near the bar talking to Jess and Charlie. 

"Heya Sam, Charlie what are you drinking???" He eyed the bright pink drink in her hand and shook his head. "Girl drinks" he muttered. Charlie just rolled her eyes and hugged him. He stood still for a minute and then hugged her back and kissed the top of her head. She was like a sister to him and always saw through his bullshit. 

"You know I'm here for you right? Just tell me who I need to beat up and I'll get Sam on it." She made a big deal of standing as straight as possible and saluting. Sam and Jess followed suit. Dean couldn't help but smile.

"Nah. I'm ok. Just don't like these fancy parties."

They all let him be but he met Sam's eyes and saw him motion to his right, to where Cas was and he knew that Sam had figured it out. All he could do now was wait for the party to end and go home. "Not now Sam. Later." Sam nodded but his expression remained soft and caring. 

He didn't talk to Cas at all during the party and when the time came for them to leave, he realized that he hadn't even greeted Balthazar, and he was a company friend and customer. Preparing himself, he walked over to where he, Castiel and Gabriel were. As he got closer he saw the way Cas' mood change. He ignored it and kept on walking until he was face to face with all three.

"Hey guys. Balthazar, sorry dude. I haven't even greeted you. Thank you for coming." He smiled and stretched his hand. Balthazar shook it and turned his gaze to Castiel. 

"Nah. Don't worry about it Dean. Here, let me introduce you. This is Castiel and I'm sure you know Gabriel seeing as to how he works here." He noticed Castiel go still and even Gabriel had a serious expression.

"Yeah, we've... we've met. Right Cas?" He tried to smile but he was fucking terrified.

"Castiel."

"What?"

"It's Castiel."

"Ohh. Um, sorry. Castiel and I already knew each other." He got no response so he continued, " Anyway, um, hope you enjoyed the party and help yourself to anything you want. Good to see you again Balthazar, you're order's ready by the way. Gabriel if you will, let him know when he can come." He turned to the blue eyes burning into his face. "Have a good evening Castiel. Excuse me." He turned and walked away. 

***

"Whew... talk about sexual tension." Gabriel joked after Dean had walked away. He knew about Dean and Cas but honestly he had thought that they'd at least be amicable towards each other. 

Castiel just kept staring at Dean's back as he walked away from him a second time, and left his heart broken. He turned to Balthazar. "I'm going home. Please enjoy the rest of the evening and forgive me for making you pass this sour moment. I'll talk to you both soon. Good night." With that, he walked out into the crisp October air and hailed a cab. As soon as he got home, he collapsed against the back of his door and wept. 

***

Dean didn't see Cas come back inside and figured he'd gone home. He continued his façade of happy entrepreneur and continued with the party. When it was over, he said goodbye to everyone and waited for everything to be in order before leaving. When he pulled into his driveway he couldn't help but notice how lonely it looked. Even with his other cars. He got out of Baby and went inside. He made it to the kitchen before collapsing on the floor against the counter and wept. He cried with his back against the counter and his head in between his knees like a small child. And all he could think of was that Cas, no , Castiel hated him.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It seemed like their fates had gotten together and decided that Dean and Castiel had to meet as often as possible after the anniversary party. well damn...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long, It's been rough with my mom and I had no free time between school, my job, and taking care of her Thanks for sticking with me guys. (:  
> Sorry it's so short.

On contrary to last night's events and how people might feel, the day was sunny, not one cloud in the sky, a soft breeze blew through the city, and birds sang high in the sky, in other words; it was a beautiful day. As he ran through the park, Dean could swear the nature was doing its damnest to mess with him. He needed the run after last night's events, he needed to burn off all the feelings that had gotten balled up inside him. He knew that at some point he would have to run into Castiel, and he knew that he would be somewhat indifferent towards him but to have him actually in front of him, and acting so cold was another thing entirely. 

Dean ran through and although it was a bit chilly outside he didn't feel it. There were a few people running like him, and some on their way to work. It was barely seven in the morning, and the streets were already filled with people. This morning Dean felt his feet hit the ground harder than usual, he felt himself getting irritated the longer he thought about his meeting with Castiel. 

He stopped next to a tree and leaned a hand against it. He took a moment to look around at the rest of the people. He was about to continue on his route when he spotted Castiel jogging next to a guy a bit taller than him. He was wearing a light blue jacket and black sweatpants and he was smiling to something that the other guy had said. Dean waited in his spot hoping that they'd run by without noticing him, unfortunately, he wasn't so lucky.

\---------

Castiel was running his usual morning route when he was approached by Michael. They stopped to talk for a bit, and Castiel was glad that he could see his colleague outside of work. He hadn't had any problems with him and Michael had always been respectful with him. He respected the boundaries that Castiel had set around himself and had become one of his closest friends. He knew that Michael wished that they could come to be something more than just colleagues but honestly, Castiel wasn't ready for that type of relationship. 

Michael convinced him to take his morning route instead and Castiel agreed. He felt a bit unsure because he was a creature of habit, but he trusted Michael and agreed nonetheless. They were halfway through the path when Michael mentioned that Balthazar was going to be in hell at work due to some caught up work that he had with Crowley, one of their best clients. He smiled at the mention of them together knowing how Balthazar hated working with Crowley, especially so early in the morning when he dared look up at the other people at the park. His eyes widened when he noticed Dean standing a few yards away. He was dressed in black sweatpants and a dark hoodie. He looked as shocked as Castiel felt and he was beautiful- no, wait. He just looked shocked, Castiel was past thinking the world of him. 

'Surree... it's not like he fills your head and thoughts day and night'

Castiel shook his head mentally and scolded his mini Gabriel voice. Of course his little voice in his head would sound just like his prankster cousin. God, the universe must hate him. He tried not to show Michael how affected he was by Dean, but most importantly, he couldn't show Dean the hold he had on him still. He held his breath when they got close and tried his best to ignore the way his heart fluttered when he saw Dean stare at him. Thankfully, Michael didn't notice what was going on and kept talking about Balthazar's antics. 

They passed Dean and soon rounded a corner out of his sight. He had run this park since he had moved and had scouted the routes to make sure not to run into Dean, but he had never seen him so he had guessed that Dean didn't run. He wasn't one for running when he was younger, but then again, that was a long time ago. 

\---------

Dean waited until they were out of sight and continued running. He was almost done anyways so he kept going, ignoring the small rise of jealousy in his chest. Ugh, he hated this! Not Castiel, but the fact that it's his fault, all of it. He hated himself. He hated that smiling, slimy, good-looking guy running with Cas. And he hated the goddamn cold! 

He looked at his watch and decided to call it a day, he had to be at the office soon. As he was rounding a turn he saw Cas and good-looking douchebag talking next to a bench. At least someone was having a good day. He jogged past them and headed home.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys. You have no idea how grateful I am to know that you are still here. Honestly it's been a rought couple of... months... and I've slacked. But it's updates from here on out.

So we've made it clear already that nature, god, mother earth, all hated Dean Winchester. After his run in with Castiel this morning, his mood visibly darkened. He couldn't stop thinking about how opened he'd seen while runing alongside that brunet. He'd had a smile on his face and he had looked so happy, so...

Well, there waa no need to work himself up over that anymore. Castiel had made it rather clear that he wasn't allowed to. He had no right to. He was the one that had left, he had broken it off with the one person that he could see himself growing old with. And now, all he had were backrow seats to Castiel's happiness. 

Dean quickly got home, took a shower and got dressed. He had an important meeting with a client coming in from Tokyo and overseeing Crowley's car as well. He was a pain in the ass but a good client. He was just born a britisk prick. After taking a shower, he made sure to put on some coffee before getting dressed. He grabbed a dark grey suit, white dress shirt and a forest green tie. Jess had given it to him as a Christmas present, saying that he had no decent one to show off his eyes. He hated to admit it, but she was right. Just as he was about to grab his jacket and put it on his phone beeped. He checked the screen and groaned when he saw Gabriel's name on the screen. 

-DEAN-O, CROWLEY'S HERE, GETTING HIS PRICKLY PANTIES IN A BUNCH OVER HIS ORDER. NEED YOUR HELP BUCKO. HE ONLY LISTENS TO YOU. -

"Great. " Dean murmured as he typed back a quit text saying he would be there in twenty. He hurriedly poured some coffee into a travel mug, grabbed his jacket and left his building. 

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Castiel went straight home as soon as they were done with their morning run. He said goodbye to Michael and made his way home. He preferred to walk wherever he went rather than pollute the air any further. On his way back he couldn't help but think of Dean. He had looked gorgeous, all hot and flustered from running... 

God, he had to stop those trains of thought. He was so lost in his Dean-thoughts that he almost missed his building. He quickly backtracked and went inside. He waved to Hael, the barista of the small café in th lobby. She waved back enthusiastically before going back to her clients. 

Castiel went straight to the shower as soon as his door closed. He chose a dark blue suit, white dress shirt and blie tie. He made some tea, pouring it into a travel mug, and leaving his apartment. As soon as he got into his office building, he got a called from Balthazar, asking him to go to his office. With a sigh, he made his way over to the elevator and pressed the button for Balthazar's floor. The ride on the elevator was quiet and allowed him to think about what Balthazar might want. Hopefully, it wouldn't involve a naked woman and a sports car. 

He didn't get much of a chance to think on it before the elevator came to a stop and he was met with a toothy-grinned Balthazar as soon as the doors opened. 

"Cassie! Lovely day, isn't it? God, I love that tie on you. Brings out your baby blues." Balthazar cried, making a few people stop and look. He had an innocent little smile on his face, but Castiel was having none of it. 

"What do you want Balthazar. I'm really not in the mood for your jokes," he looked around and noticed that everyone was once again immersed in their work. "I do have a job to do you know, this can wa..." 

"I need you to go pick up my order from where Gabriel works."


End file.
